My Museum of 4 o’clock in the Morning

During a class I took a few semesters ago we watched the above video, a TED talk about a reoccurring theme in one man’s life. The purpose of our watching was to have us look at our lives and see what continued to surface. This caused me to reflect on what themes are constant in my life, thoughts and writing. I came to discover that everything I do usually revolves around the concept of time. Time is definitely an obsession of mine. Whether its me watching “Doctor Who” or “A Wrinkle in Time” or I’m reading history or sci-fi or I’m discussing my ideas for books it always seems to come back to time.

I feel as though this is an obsession for many reasons. First off the concept of time is so vast and mysterious. There is always a question of what is it really? How do I use it the best way I can? Are there loopholes and rifts? And so many more questions. Once I open the box I can’t close it, ideas and questions keep flowing out and I can’t stop.

There is something magical and mysterious in this concept. Unobtainable and yet it is ours. Everyone has time and yet we also don’t, how is that possible? We can control how we “spend”our time and yet cannot control time itself. Human beings are constantly talking about how “time flies” or “the time is dragging on”. These concepts I always feel like I must explore or play with. I love the idea of twisting the concepts of time to create a masterpiece.   To be playful with something that is such a large part of everyone’s lives and so serious. Even how time is different for everyone else. We spend it differently, it seems to pass differently, it ends or begins at different times. The concept is something so fantastical and yet real that is is so fascinating.

Something I have discovered over the last few months is that we all spend our time how we want to live our lives. You are the decider of your future. No one else can decide that for you. No matter who you take advice from or who tells you how you should spend your time, in the end you are going to do what you decide to do. It may be detrimental to your future but that is your decision.

And all of this is not to say you should stress over every minute of each day. Do what my grandma always tells me and, “just enjoy your life”. You might fall down and “mess up”, but that’s ok. Sometimes you need that to happen, it is part of learning. I’ve discovered how important it is to have those in my life who have gone through major things in life already. I don’t have to learn from the same mistakes, they already did it. I can learn from their experiences and go through my own trials.

The biggest thing I have learned about time is that I decide my future and how important it is to be myself. It truly is life changing. Enjoy yourself!

With Love, Lillian


  1. Interesting thoughts. What’s that saying? That humans often overestimate what they can do in a day, but underestimate what they can do in a year?
    That’s how time is to me. It allows us to explore things we’re not good at, because when applied over the long term, there’s very little we can’t achieve. Anyway, thanks for this post!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Interesting observation. When you say that it definitely sticks out as something we as humans do.

      Ive just realized that our lives are a compilation of what we do everyday. So if we want a change we need to change our habits, etc.


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